The Life Impossible

Finished October 31

The Life Impossible by Matt Haig

This is a story of life, of loss, of connection. It is about appreciating the world, and how everyone has their own story. 

The story is structured around emails by a man to his former teacher, and her response. Her response is the major portion of the novel and tells of her life, particularly when she received an inheritance from a former fellow teacher of a house in Ibiza, Spain. 

The narrator, Grace Winters is a retired math teacher. She tells of the brief friendship she had with Christina, an art teacher, particularly one Christmas that they spent together. Christina left for Spain soon after, and Grace went on to marry, have a child, and experience loss. Mathematics is both a comfort and a coping mechanism. Whenever she feels overwhelmed, she does math in her head. 

When she decides to go to Spain to see this house, she doesn't know what to expect, but it certainly isn't this ugly little house in the middle of nowhere. She finds she has also been left a car, and a list of recommended things to do. There is also a plan that she isn't aware that involves one of Christina's friends. The experience she undergoes changes her life forever. It takes her grief and loss, and her depression and takes her out of them, to see the world around her, in all its beauty and pain. Grace finds that she has been given a task, but also an opportunity, and she must open herself up to this experience as she faces her past and her pain and recognizes that others have their own stories that also resonate with her.

There is an amorphous being that is part of this story, a life presence from another place, that has power that Grace learns to draw from. This is a tale that feels both fantastical and relatable. A very interesting book that is hard to define. 

People Change

Finished June 21

People Change by Vivek Shraya

This short book looks at change from a human point of view. The author herself has undergone many changes in her life: professional changes and personal ones. Here she looks at what factors lead to change for us, based on her own experiences. Sometimes there are things that happen early in our lives, when we are still figuring ourselves out, and events or experiences can influence us in major ways. 

There is also a common fear of change, and that is covered here as well, sometimes trapping us in a place in our lives that we may not always recognize as a trap. 

This book encourages us to celebrate our changes, to be open to experiences that offer different ways of being, and new inspirations for our existence. 

Sometimes, this book feels 'stream of consciousness' in its flow, and other times it digs deeper into the motivations beneath those meandering thoughts. I read this book slowly, pausing to consider different ideas along the way. 

Finding Lucy

Finished February 2
Finding Lucy by Eugenie Fernandes

This picture book follows a young girl as she first paints for herself and the joy of it, then tries to please various others that view her work with critical eyes and try to have her paint to their preferences. She finds that no matter how hard she tries, they aren't satisfied and she become more and more unhappy.
It is interesting to see how they tell her that what they see is less than what the painting is to her, and how she begins to work their ideas into her work, trying to be polite in her interactions with them, even when they aren't polite to her.
I liked the twists and turns as others came and went and the surprise when she kissed the frog. Lucy encouraged others even when they weren't happy with her work.
It is her cat, whose has been with her from the beginning, that finally reminds her of how she began painting and why she did it.
This book is full of colour and movement and there are so many small things to see when you look at it, just like a good painting.
This book is a reminder to readers that we are all individual and should express ourselves in the way that feels right to us, no matter what others say.

Queenie Quail Can't Keep Up

Finished February 9
Queenie Quail Can't Keep Up by Jane Whittingham, illustrated by Emma Pedersen

This engaging picture book uses word repetition, alliteration, imagery, and onomatopoeia to bring the story of this young bird and her family to life. As Queenie's parents and siblings rush around around, she keeps getting distracted by the interesting things around her, noticing other creatures, plants, and other bits of the world around her. It is only when her wider outlook on the world enables her to sense danger before the rest of her brood that they begin to value her unique way of being.
I liked the simple drawings which showed movement and a softness of detail. I especially liked the fat bumblebees. I also liked how the use of sizing, colour, and placement in the words of the story made the noises of the birds come to life, and drew the reader the emphasize the actions and urgings.
This is a delightful story of stopping to take delight in the world around us, and valuing the contributions that we may not always recognize as being helpful.
Lovely.

Flo

Finished February 7
Flo by Kyo Maclear, pictures by Jay Fleck

This picture book features Flo, a small panda bear, and, as we are told on the first page of the story, the littlest in her family. Flo is also definitely one that marches to her own tune, and the story goes through her imaginary adventures, her love of music, and other things that show us her personality.
She is the one the others wait for, and when we see the weekly schedule, we see how many activities are on the agenda for the pandas. And we also see how Flo stops to take in the world around her, and interact with it.
When something goes wrong with the activity the others are doing though, they find that Flo's different way of thinking can be quite helpful. And the next day, they all try things her way.
A fun book about how it is okay to be different.

Solitude

Finished June 10
Solitude: A Singular Life in a Crowded World by Michael Harris

This book caused me to stop and think many times. Following the introduction, the book is split into four sections, with the first two sections having two chapters and the latter two four chapters. In the introduction, Harris tells us of one of his inspirations for the book, finding out about the amazing experience of Dr. Edith Bone. Bone was imprisoned in Hungary in 1949 on her way back to the airport to fly home to England after a visit to family. It took some time for people to realize she was missing, and then discover what happened to her. She was in solitary confinement for seven years. Instead of going mad, or breaking down, she found ways to occupy her mind and emerged "a little wiser and full of hope."
Her story set Harris to thinking about the art of being alone, and to examine how our culture works against this ability. The first section looks at what people do when they're alone, how they occupy themselves. He finds that technology has filled those times that we used to have alone with attachments to others. If we disconnect from it, we often worry about what we've missed. The move towards social media and the sharing economy has only increased the need for connection. So he looks at what happens when we lose that capacity for a rich inner life. He finds that even though the capacity for solitude has decreased, the spread of loneliness has increased. As the saying goes, you can be lonely even in a crowd. Connection in the way that we now define it doesn't overcome loneliness. In fact, it can actually emphasize the feeling.
Another negative impact of the loss of solitude is the loss of the "ability to engender new ideas." The "aha" moment isn't one that normally occurs in a group, but comes to us as we let our brains loose to explore without reining them in. Loss of solitude also negatively impacts self-knowledge.
In the second section he looks at research around solitude, and the skill of daydreaming. I remember being criticized by teachers and even sometimes family for daydreaming. Luckily, instead of stopping, I just became better at stepping away from others to engage in it. I need my time to myself to either sit with myself, read and think, or do something like needlework that can let my mind wander away. Harris talks about the pressure to be doing something, and this reads true for me. Studies show that what happens to our brain when we daydream is a necessary piece to forming our identity. He talks about the rational mind versus the intuitive mind, and how even our work spaces have been changed to encourage collaboration and engagement rather than times of creative solitude.
The third section looks at identity and its relationship to solitude. Forming our own style means not conforming to the role society would have us take: what to wear, how to act, the proper way to talk, and many other "ways" that are expected of us. Even our technology pushes us in this direction. To have our technological tools work more efficiently, they like us to behave in predictable ways. The information that we are fed through our technology is based on previous choices we have made. Even the way we move is influenced by technology. It guides us to our destination, and we follow its instructions. We lose the serendipity of discovery that travel used to bring. Harris talks to researchers about mapping, our mental maps, and our wayfinding skills. This made me feel a lot better about the way I often ignore my car GPS's instructions if I see something interesting or don't like the way it is suggesting. The younger generation is particularly influenced by this tracking that is a given with today's technology. Someone has often been sharing moments of their lives broadly since birth, programming their time with educational opportunities, playdates, and sports, leaving them little time to be solitary. It also makes people more anxious when they don't know someone's whereabouts. We don't have permission to go off grid, to leave our phones and cameras behind and just live the experience. We don't have comfort with the experience of losing control of what may happen.
The fourth section is about how we allow others time for solitude, and how we communicate in our solitude. Harris investigates what happens to us when we read, and how reading, by allowing us to enter the experience of others unlike us, allows us to learn empathy. He looks at how even writing books has changed, with the advent of apps like Wattpad. He looks at the art of letter writing, and how it differs from the instant or near instant communication that we have come to accept as the norm. Harris looks at death and the growing demand for ways to prolong life, or at least appear to. He looks at digital memory-making, and the creation of avatars that outlive us, at the idea of the singularity. He tells us of his own experience with solitude as he took a week in a remote cottage, with no human contact and how he experienced that, including how he experienced coming back out of it.
This book was absolutely fascinating and I cannot recommend it highly enough.

The Bob Watson

Finished August 28
The Bob Watson by Greg Bardsley

This novel features a man, Rick Blanco, who works at a desk job for a large corporation in California. Rick has been lusting after his nephew's nanny, Audrey, for years, and when she suddenly agrees to go out with him if he meets some requirements in regard to his nephew, he can't believe the chance and will do anything to make it happen. Part of the impetus for this is Collin's family's imminent move to another country for his father's work.
Rick and his sister Ana are not that close, and we only gradually learn why as the book unfolds. But he has taken time for his nephew Collin, doing things with him that are fun, whimsical, and not necessarily related to his future prospects. He genuinely cares about Collin and wants to spend time with him when he can. He also has sincere doubts about his own abilities to do the right thing, to not screw up, and this is another thing we gradually learn the roots of as the book unfolds.
Early in his career, Rick observed another man at his company, who has since moved on, as he found a way to get out of unproductive meetings without people noticing. Rick paid attention to what he did and found his own ways of doing similar things. He calls these activities "the Bob Watson" after the man he initially observed.
When Rick first receives the communication from Audrey, he is in one of these unproductive meetings, and he pulls a Bob Watson move to get out of it and uses a previous contact to find something cool to do with Collin. But as he does so, he finds that the people he encounters think he is Dick Rayborne, the HR director for his company, and a man who has done many things that have not been good for the employees. As they take Rick on a wild spree around town, through people's homes, luxury hotels, and the company's executive offices, Rick learns about Dick's actions and about his own abilities to make a real difference in the world, something that will offer his nephew an experience that he will never forget.
One of the lines from the book that is significant: "We're never gonna survive unless we get a little crazy."
I was initially a little confused by the book, but as I read further and began to sense the history behind Rick's issues, I began to really enjoy it. This is a book that offers hope against the world as it is now, that looks out for the people who can't look out for themselves. A great read.

Children's Fiction

Finished March 13
I couldn't sleep so I sat up and read a pile of kid's books I've been considering for gifts. And they were all winners!
I started with The Death Defying Pepper Roux by Geraldine McCaughrean. This book follows a young boy in France, who has been told that he won't live until his fourteenth birthday. He has lived his life praying and following strict guidelines. As the day of his fourteenth birthday approaches, he breaks away from his life, taking on the persona of a variety of others as he runs from his supposed destiny. From ship's captain, to delicatessen worker, to journalist, to telegram boy, to the foreign legion, he finds himself friends, allies, and adventures. A great tale of belief, self-reliance, and perception.
Next up was When you Reach Me by Rebecca Stead. This tale follows Miranda a young girl in New York City. Miranda lives in an apartment with her mother, and helps her prepare to compete on a game show. Strange things start happening in her life. Her friend Sal gets punched for no apparent reason by a boy in their neighbourhood, the spare key for Miranda's apartment goes missing, and then she gets a mysterious note. It asks that she do something to save her friend's life. At first Miranda is confused and then scared. As another note comes to her, she begins to wonder if she can do what it asks. Along the way, Miranda makes new friends, and learn new wonderful things. A tale that was delightful.
The third book is Mockingbird by Kathryn Erskine. Here, Caitlin and her father are trying to come to terms with the sudden violent death of Caitlin's older brother Devon. Caitlin has Asperger's, and she has trouble reading other people's emotions and finding the appropriate response. She works with a counselor at her school who helps her find ways to improve her skills. As she looks for ways to deal with her own grief and loss and help her father deal with his, she becomes engrossed with the idea of Closure and works toward a way of finding it. A wonderful story that lets you inside Caitlin's head to see what someone with Asperger's experiences, and how their unique outlook can affect those around them. A wonderful story.
The fourth book I read was a Canadian fantasy book, Nieve by Terry Griggs. Nieve lives with her parents in a small town near a larger city. Her parents are professional weepers, hired by those experiencing loss or sadness. Her grandmother follows the old ways and has taught them to Nieve. When some of the people in town disappear, including Nieve's best friend Malcolm, she gets worried. Nieve finds strange weeds that start to grow everywhere and a duo, Wormius and Ashe, who arrive in town trailing a cloud of darkness. The darkness spreads everywhere and more and more people go missing. Nieve finally is able to go to her grandmother who shows her how to help her community overcome the darkness that is threatening to destroy them. From evil injections, to spirits, to magical footwear, Nieve finds new friends, strength in herself and great adventure. A very interesting tale of good versus evil.
A very productive night!

New Fiction with a Touch of Fantasy

Finished September 12
Extraordinary by Nancy Werlin
Having read Werlin's previous novel, Impossible, and loved it, I jumped at the chance for a copy of this book from Penguin. Again we have a teen girl as the main character, and a situation that has more to it than she first thinks.
Phoebe Rothschild is growing up as part of a wealthy, high-achieving family, but she doesn't always feel that she lives up to what her family's standards are. When Mallory enters the scene as the new girl at school, and is different enough that she becomes a target of the popular girls, Phoebe befriends her. The two grow very close, but Mallory is not all that she seems, and when Mallory's brother Ryland enters Phoebe's life, things change again. Phoebe becomes fascinated by Ryland, and he begins to influence her in ways she doesn't always like.
Phoebe has another friend, Benjamin, who has always helped to ground her, and although she only sees him a few times a year, they have a strong friendship.
When Phoebe finds out the true nature of Mallory and Ryland and what they are asking of her, she is shocked and dismayed. As she learns the reasons behind their actions, she isn't sure whether she can do what they want or not. We see Phoebe grow and learn about her self and what she is capable of and what is important to her.
This is a story about friendship, about individuality, and about self-confidence. A great book for teen girls.
Thank you Penguin.

Finished earlier this week

Finished March 9
Without Reservations by Alice Steinbach
This memoir of a journey through Europe is a winner. Alice, with her sons off living their own lives, feels like she is in a rut. She looks a the things that she wanted to do and didn't and decides to take a leave from her job as a journalist and travel for several months. Because she wants to immerse herself in her surroundings, she chooses a few places in Europe and makes her plans in advance for accommodation and, in some cases, activities.
Throughout she sent postcards back to her home near Baltimore telling her impressions of her journey. She takes a break from her journalistic outlook and tries to look at things with fresh eyes. She makes friends, both longer-term and temporary, gains new ideas, and revisits old skills and attitudes. In making this jourey she rediscovers her own independent identity, not as a journalist or as someone's mother, but as a person.
She begins in Paris, where she begins a wonderful friendship; goes on to London, where she explores both new and old; Oxford, where she takes a course on the history of English villages, and rediscovers dancing; and Italy, where she spends time in many places, including Milan and Venice. This is a great memoir and a book full of interesting thoughts and insights.

Family Story

Finished July 4
Constance by Rosie Thomas
Constance was found in a hedge when she was only a few hours old, abandoned by her mother. Growing up, she also felt lesser to her deaf sister Jeanette. After she discovers that she was adopted, she finds herself even more the outsider in her family. When she falls in love with Jeanette's fiance, Bill, she estranges herself from the family voluntarily.
She does well for herself, writing music for advertisements and films, but she can't resolve her love for Bill and that remains a presence in her life.
When she gets word that her sister is dying, she returns to England, and tries to reconcile with her sister.
There is also a side story here of a young woman, Roxana, from Uzbekistan trying to become an "English girl". Roxana has determination and a sense of self, and inspires Constance to face up to her life and what she really wants.

Audio Classic

Finished February 21
On the Road by Jack Kerouac, performed by Matt Dillon
This was another of those classics that I'd never read, and I'd heard this audio version was good so decided I should take a listen. Perhaps I'm from the wrong generation (born in the early 60s) but it really didn't engage me.
I was surprised to find how much of this book was not what I expected. I guess that with a classic one starts to get certain ideas about the kind of book it is and I'm not sure even where all of the those preconceived ideas came from. It was less a travel book (I expected a book about America, similar perhaps to Steinbeck's Travels with Charley) and less a book about a certain group of people from a certain generation. I was surprised as well about how much non-conformist behaviour occured prior to the sixties. Sal's peers are actually a little before my own parents (born in the late 30s) and yet seem so much more radical.
I was put off by Sal's friend Dean and his behaviour. He never really seemed to take responsibility for his actions and his treatment of the women he met was definitely demeaning.
I'm glad I've read it and it made me think about some things in a different way, but it's definitely not a favourite.

Wonderful Novel

Finished November 25
The Vanishing Act of Esme Lennox by Maggie O'Farrell
This novel both fascinates and horrifies. Esme Lennox was born in India and came to Scotland with her family as a schoolgirl, following her brother's death from typhoid. Esme is a non-conformist, good in school but not popular with her fellow students. They make fun of her for her lack of social skills, but don't really try to get to know her. She is close to her older sister Kitty, but it is Kitty that eventually betrays her secrets. Her defiance of social norms and independents spirit eventually cause her parents to put her into a mental hospital at the age of sixteen, and she does not get released until the hospital is closing more than sixty years later. The story goes back and forth between the past, the ramblings of her sister (who has Alzheimers), and the present. I could barely put this book down.
Highly recommended.

Great sequel to teen novel

Finished October 21
Love, Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli
This followup to the novel Stargirl, picks up where the earlier book let off. Stargirl has moved from Arizona to a small town in Pennsylvania and has gone back to being homeschooled. As she comes to terms with her feelings regarding her ex-boyfriend Leo, back in Arizona, she learns about the people around her in her new neighbourhood. There is the energetic 3-year-old down the street who adopts her as a big sister. The man who sits in the cemetary every day by his wife's grave. The agoraphobic woman who misses the garden she used to tend. And of course the boy with the blue eyes. All these characters and more grow to care for Stargirl and become part of her new life. She also find solace in meditation and the cycles of the seasons, creating a solar calendar in a nearby field where she tracks the sun from the summer solstice to the winter solstice. Stargirl has more than ever to share with the world as she learns to value her own feelings. This is a great follow-up and a good book against conforming to the norm.

Finished three in a day

Finished April 20
The Sunday List of Dreams by Kris Radish
This was a great book and very positive and uplifting.
Connie Franklin Nixon, divorced mother of 3 grown daughters is just about to retire from her career as a nurse. Before starting as a medical consultant, she has three months in which to fulfill some of the dreams she has been adding to her list since she was pregnant with her first daughter. As she goes through her household, getting rid of things, she discovers that her oldest daughter has a business making and selling sex toys. This launches her into her list faster than ever and takes her to a new relationship with all of her daughters, a new awareness of herself, new friends of many ages, and a new career that she never dreamed of.
I highly recommend this book and am buying a copy for my own mother.

Once by Morris Gleitzman
This young adult book follows a young boy, Felix Saint Stanislaus as he leaves the Catholic orphanage that his Jewish parents entrusted him to when he thinks he might be able to help them. As he gradually discovers the reality of the situation for Jews in Austria he meets other young children, a Jewish dentist who is helping them and a variety of Nazis. He learns different ways to survive and function in the world he lands in, and how to help others. He is a natural storyteller and this makes it easier for the others he is with to deal with their realities.

Christine Falls by Benjamin Black (aka John Banville), read by Timothy Dalton
This great crime novel stars Garret Quirke, a Dublin pathologist who was adopted out of an orphanage as a young boy by a leading Dublin judge. He has grown up with the Judge's own son and the two married sisters from Boston. Quirke's wife, Delia, died in childbirth 20 years ago.
Now Quirke discovers that his adopted brother has falsified a record for another young woman who has died giving birth and this sets him off on a quest for the truth that leads to other deaths, beatings, and back to Boston.