Saturday 7 March 2020

You Do You

Finished February 22
You Do You: How to Be Who You Are and Use What You've Got to Get What You Want by Sarah Knight

This is Knight's third book about taking control of you own life. I've read her first book, The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck. This book starts with an orientation exercise.
The first main section of the books talks about the Dos and Don'ts that society puts forward and Knight goes through them and shows how they aren't necessarily true. Covered here are "Don't Be Selfish", "Do Your Best", "Don't Be Difficult", "Do Be a Team Player", and "Don't Quit Your Day Job". The next section does the same with Wills and Won'ts: "You Will Change Your Mind", "You Won't Get Anywhere with that Attitude", "You Will Regret That", "You Won't Get a Good Job if You Don't Go to College", and "You Will Never Live That Down".
The third section deals with Shoulds and Shouldn'ts: "You Should Always Put Family First", "You Shouldn't Act So Crazy", "You Should Smile More", "You Shouldn't Eat That", and "You Should Check Your Ego at the Door."
Throughout the book, Knight talks about how to interact with those that declaim these statements to you in expectation that you will conform. She talks about how to look inward and check your own motivations and plans and make decisions that make sense for you. Some of them may fit into others' expectations, but they may not. Either is okay. The main thing is that you should think about how your decisions affect others, and that you should do what's right for you as long as you aren't causing harm to others. You will be judged by others, and perhaps even by yourselves, but that is not harm.
Her advice is good. Look at things realistically, but not with society as the judge. If someone is telling you that some decision is wrong for you, think about what led you to that decision and about how no one knows what is right for you better than you do.
This is a book to read slowly and refer back to when you need to.

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